Our New Christmas Tradition

It all started with discontent and a conversation on Halloween.
Well, it started long before that really, but that would take a while to tell about those seeds. But Halloween was when those seeds turned to sprouts and several weeks later some little fruits appeared.

So it goes like this...
I don't recall exactly how, but the canned milk version (you know, sweetened and condensed) starts with a conversation I had with my friend Brian. We were going on about Christmas consumerism, children's wish lists and post Thanksgiving Day riots and the line was thrown out "We should go make breakfast for the homeless" or something along those lines. I think at that point we realized that this was something we needed to actually act on. In the next week or so rough plans were made for a trial run in early December.
I will just be honest, in the back of my mind I really hoped, just a little bit, that there would be some really good reason that it just wouldn't work out to do this. I've always been the guy to sneer at the bum holding a cardboard sign on a street corner. Or looked with a wrinkled up nose at a transient passed out in an alley. I've gladly, mercilessly, kicked homeless trespassers out of the laundry rooms my employer owns. Once, several years ago, I was heading home after making a few craigslist sales and had 700 or $800 in hand as I pulled off the freeway. And right there was some guy begging for my money. He was only a few feet away. I picked up my stack of cash and thumbed slowly through it as he watched until the light turned green. Really doing the Lords work there, Josh. What a shame.
But no deviation of our plans came. Brian didn't back out. I didn't plan something "by accident" to derail our breakfast with the homeless. I was actually starting to feel some excitement overcoming my trepidation. We planned our parts of the meal and what we would bring and where we would go. We discussed our hope of what this would become. Our intentions for our families involvement. How we could use this to actually honor our Savior, especially on the day that we usually set aside to honor Him.

A couple days before the "big day" Carin asked what our plans were, how it was going to go and if this was a wise use of our resources. Though Brian and I did have a basic plan for what we wanted to do we had no idea if it would work. We never had experience in this kind of thing. We didn't know if the areas we were planning on going would have the people we were looking for. We didn't know if what we were doing was legal (Nor did we care, actually). We didn't know how we'd be received. But, I told Carin, one thing I was sure of is that some way, some how God had impressed on my heart and Brian's that this is what we needed to do. It was the same clear headed kick in the butt feeling I had when I decided to go on my first mission trip. The same feeling when I knew Carin was going to be my wife. The same in my gut, in my heart, clearly this is what I was meant to do kind of feeling that I have had on a handful of occasions. I didn't have answers to all my questions or hers but I knew this was something that I needed to do.
Now, some of the people that are reading this are rightly thinking "Big deal! You are helping people out. Its not scary, its fun!" And you people are right. And you are much more mature than me. And maybe you are predisposed to this kind of ministry. Maybe the churches you've grown up in do this kind of thing. I haven't. The churches I've grown up in (my present church not included) never did anything like this. The attitude always seemed to be "That's good for somebody else to do" or "I sent a check to the Gospel Mission" or even "Those that are doing it aren't doing it right so we can't help them". And so for me it is scary. Its uncomfortable. It really does require faith. I'm a chicken.

And so the morning came. We had decided to make breakfast just like we did when camping. Brian and I loaded a few bags of oranges and bananas, a coffee maker, a cooler with four dozen eggs, six pounds of ground breakfast sausage, a bag of tortillas, and bag of chocolates, and a Coleman stove into the back of his truck.
Arriving in Seattle we parked under I-5 on the side of the road and across the street from a row of blue tarps, lumpy sleeping bags and dirty backpacks. After realizing that our coffee maker setup was a no-go we got the first three or four breakfast burritos wrapped in foil, grabbed a sack of fruit and jumped the guard rail. A sleeping bag stirred and an eye stared up at us. "Would you like some hot breakfast?" I said. "And how 'bout a banana or an orange?" Brian offered. The smile that cracked across that homeless mans face immediately killed my fear and doubt. This was incredible!

Over the next two hours or so Brian and I handed out 50+ bfast burritos. We ran out of food to soon. We drove away planning our next trip.

This Christmas morning our friend Minta, Carin, Ethan and I loaded up the Subaru with a cooler full of bacon and eggs and tortillas and fruit and chocolates. We got to hand out even more breakfast burritos and fruit than before. And Ethan fearlessly gave chocolates to everyone he met. And that is my goal in all of this. To train not just myself to have compassion for others, but to lead my family in that compassion. For Ethan to grow up a better man than me. To remember that Jesus, my Savior, looked at my wretched self, not with scorn but with compassion. He reached out to me when I had nothing to offer and offered me hope. And life. For me to hold back compassion, as I have in the past, is not only shameful, it is not like my Father. On Christmas we celebrate Gods condescension to the flesh, becoming like us so that eventually He could die in our place. And when we help the helpless we can be imitators of our God. And that seems like a good way to celebrate Him.

I think we found a new Christmas tradition. But I think we'll have to practice this tradition throughout the year.

I'm Gay and I Like Rainbows

There I said it. (But please read all the way through, so there is no misunderstanding😀)

With all this blustering and such over the Duck Dynasty/A&E situation it has been giggle worthy to see the diversity movement try to give diversity a curb sandwich. Some guy from GLAAD decries what Phil Robertson says the Bible says about "gays" is "vile". It is serious. And it is seriously funny. Like belly-aching-laughing-funny!
GLAAD promotes males putting their male parts in the "back alley dumpster" and they think they know what "vile" means? Like, if you aren't laughing at them at this point you are wrong.

But doesn't this speak to two problems? One is understandable, the other is embarrassing. Both require repentance.

Problem one: Unregenerate mankind will warp everything. They take a word like "gay", which at one time meant "happy and carefree" and make it mean "I'm confused about my sexuality". They then take a biblical symbol that reminds us of Gods promise that He won't flood the earth again and churn it into a symbol of "diversity". And then they take that multi-colored banner and beat anybody who diverges from their definition of diversity. You know, anything for tolerance. And then there's the whole same sex marriage thing. ( One wise man man has rightly referred to it as "same sex mirage")
But this is understandable because they are not regenerated and renewed to salvation in Christ. Repentance can change that.

Problem two: Christians who don't laugh and fight. We need to do both. We laugh because the fight is already won and because it is really silly when people call good things dirty and dirty things good. Or say rainbows are about diversity. Or call two dudes holding hands a marriage. We need to fight for those things. And in doing so we need to be gay. Gay as in happy. Not angry that the sinner is acting like a sinner (for once, so also weren't we?) but happy that we are free to to no longer act like that and to come alongside and show others the freedoms that we now have. That's joy. And that is Christian combat. And we can repent for not fighting for rainbows, marriage and being joyful combatants. For not loving sinners properly. For waiting for somebody else to take the stand. For not being leaders. We should know better.

So I am happy (gay) and I love the promise (of rainbows) that God will not wipe us out in a worldwide flood again. And that marriage (in spite of what any earthly law says) is still between a man and a woman. And like Shakespeare has been known to say, that a rose by any other name is still a rose.

Thanksgiving Thankfulness

Most everything I blog about is an edited or expanded version of notes I keep in a couple little notebooks I always have on hand. Sometimes its an idea I've entertained for a long period of time in a notebook and then gets a rough draft here that sits for several weeks or several months. Off the top of my head I can only think of a couple of posts that went from concept to blog without sitting in Draft Purgatory for some amount of time. There are at least three sitting there right now waiting for me to purchase some indulgences.

But one thing I can write about without draft (and can't seem to sleep without writing about now) is the things I am thankful for.
I learned a lot about being thankful from people who have much less than you or I. Really those are the kind of people that are typically the most thankful. I mean, look at us Americans. We can wallow in our wealth and complain that we don't have enough. But those who have little are often hugely thankful for the little things. The Ukrainian people are the ones that taught me much about appreciating little things as well as the big ones. Though I have a lot to improve on I can remember some of those lessons from 18+ years ago. I learned to be thankful (and rightfully ashamed) for having enough clothes and possessions in my dorm to make a mess. The Ukrainian kids in our camp didn't. I learned to appreciate that the soles of my shoes still stuck to my shoes and that glue could hold them together when that no longer became the case, instead of throwing them out. A not so little thing learned was to appreciate the country God gave me and the value still of other countries and cultures.

It's good to be thankful for the things that make us uncomfortable, because they are God given opportunities to grow. I'm thankful that right now I find no real joy in working for my current employer. Yes, really. It's helping me to see some flaws in my character I would have been blind to otherwise. And it is helping me to work on my patience. And another place of employment. And it makes it even more fun working a part time job with some really fun people.

Its late and my list is endless so here is some things I would put into my "Big" things  to be thankful for: My wife. It hasn't always been easy but its always been worth it. I couldn't ask God for anything better than spending my life with her. And yet He gave us something to be thankful for together too, our son Ethan. What a delight! I'm thankful for the roof over our heads and how it worked to live here. For my Dad and step mom, Aletha. They are an endless blessing and encouragement. For my in laws. Most people have horror stories for mother in laws. I don't. I'm glad Ethan will have good examples from both sets of grandparents.
I'm grateful for friends that let you borrow a vehicle for over a year and a half and think you have done them a favor. And I'm thankful that that vehicle was a Jeep Rubicon Unlimited. If you aren't a Jeep person that is the equivalent to handing the keys to your top of the line Mercedes over to somebody and saying "Take care of my car, I'll be gone awhile". Thanks Eric and Leah. We owe you, not the other way around.

I'm thankful for a son that says "Papa,hup" when he needs help.

Some small things, and these things are very small and unnecessary to living but that's an even better reason to thank God: I'm thankful for milk. I'm an adult but I like milk. Its the best beverage after a long day at work. Don't laugh. I'm thankful I can read. And for good, really good books. Campfires in the cold. And cigars to smoke. And whiskey to share with friends. I'm thankful I can blog from a "notebook" and not a phone anymore. In any list of thanks I'm thankful for my Jeep. Many guys have had to sell their "dream car" to be responsible men. They are good men. I have been fortunate that no one wanted mine when it was for sale. Hopefully it will be Ethan's someday.

We have so much to be thankful for in this country. We need to exercise our thankfulness while we have so much to be thankful for because we are coming into an age where those things will be harder to find. Always give thanks to God.

Something a Little Different

I recently watched a video put out by Patagonia. They are a "builder" of fine outdoor gear and their video is their response to the "everything is disposable" mentality. I encourage you to watch the 27 minute video.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z20CjCim8DM&feature=youtube_gdata_player

So this got me thinking. I recall a new found friend of mine talking about replacing his "old" car. I was astounded to find out his old car was newer than anything I'd ever owned! It was only four years old!  I couldn't fathom that mentality. He never wanted to own a car that had over 100,000 miles on it. Geez! That's the minimum mileage on any car I'd ever owned.
I buy things to last. I don't have deep pockets to buy expensive things but I've heard it said "Buy once,cry once" and found it to be true.

I think of the gear that I've been fortunate enough to buy or trade or have gifted to me. I've cut down on some of what I have since we've condensed our lives and possessions into condo living. There is a saying in the firearms community "Beware of the man with one gun". Basically, its saying that if you have one tool, one gun, you know it and are the master of it. I've tried to take that approach with some of my gear while considering another saying: "One is none and two is one". Essentially, have a backup.
I have a few high end flashlights. All made by Surefire. The cheapest one (about $40) I bought. The other two were gifts. They've been dropped, run over, stolen and found, lit up the bottom of a lake,helped flag down police, and they still keep helping me find addresses, blind angry dogs and find my way through dark basements at work. I've had these lights for as long as 7-8 years. My son will be using these lights.

I have a sleeping bag that I can't even recall the maker of right now. I've used it for over 12 years in mountains locally and in temps down into the single digits to the high Sierra's in the summer time. It just started losing some of the thread near the Velcro cover for the zipper. A little duct tape will stave off any more thread loss.

There are three North Face items in my closet that are around 8-10 years old. A rain\ cold weather jacket with a removable liner that can be worn separately and a fleece vest. Oh, and a slightly newer fleece jacket. All work as good as they did on the day that I bought them.

There are three camp stoves that have made the finest meals known to man. The standard Coleman two burner for family camping. An MSR Pocket Rocket that Carin has used primarily and an MSR Dragonflyt that is my precious. I found it in a garbage can. Apparently the previous owner didn't know that occasionally you had to maintain the thing and tossed it. Five minutes of work and this $130+ stove has cooked many meals in the nastiest weather the PNW has to offer.

Carin introduced Ingenious wool socks to me years ago. I still have my first pair. And you can't tell the difference between them and my newest pair that are a year old. One pair costs as much as a Costco pack of regular cotton socks but I found that one pair lasts at least seven times as long. And stay just as comfortable.

Stuff. That's all it is. And in my case its very specific stuff. If you aren't into camping you don't really care about my stove or my flashlight. Maybe you are into Mac's or PC's. Or $100 muck boots (God forbid!). Or solid sewing machines. Or woodworking tools. The reader I aim to encourage is, like me, a Christian. We are called to be good stewards. We are called to be thankful.
Use wisdom in what you purchase. Don't deplete your savings or rack up debt to buy expensive things you don't need but also consider that later you may be able to bless your children or others with what you purchase now.

Do Your Share

When young men seek to be like you, when lazy men resent you, and powerful men look over their shoulder at you, when cowardly men plot behind your back, when corrupt men wish you were gone and evil men want you dead, only then will you have done your share. - Phil Messina

Goose Eggs

Qui docet discit. He who teaches learns. When it comes to parenting maybe the phrase should be "qui docet discit exponatiali" Which might be Latin for "he who teaches learns, exponentially". ( I make my Latin up as I go). Our offspring are little reflectors of us both in general sin and specific sin. And, at least in my case, the lessons learned, the reflections seen, by me the parent are often more painful than than the ones learned by the child.

Let's scrape one recent event onto the slide and peak through the microscope...
Ethan is now five months passed his second birthday and thinks nothing is more fun than running away when he is beckoned hither.
And we explain why that is not recommended behavior and discipline accordingly. So recently when I called him to me before I left for work I saw the fire in his eyes that said "dad must not be serious, I shall run!" it disappointed me a little more than usual. I mean ,we've really been working on this. And he should know better. And it made me a little sad.
And then he jumped up onto the couch.
And I could see exactly what was going to happen.
He started backing up, closer to the far edge, closer to a backwards flip ending with his head bouncing off the hard edge of the ottoman. But in his mind here was old dad, ruining his fun. And that is exactly what happened as I tried and failed to apprehend his reverse dive to disobedience and goose eggs. "Damn it!", I cursed, telling myself that was in reference to his sin.  I think it was.
He cried, surprised that his escape didn't lead to chocolate milk and happiness.

And right there as he sat crying on my knee, I saw my reflection in his tears. All to often I seek temporary fun- running from my Heavenly Father- and every time it leads to disappointment and spiritual goose eggs. And God isn't grumpy with me, muttering "I told you so" under His breath, tapping His foot waiting for me to grovel. No, He wants to continue in relationship with me.

As a father I need to reflect to my son the love, the "welcome back" to the relationship kind of attitude that my Father has shown to me. When the prodigal son returned home he looked up as his father ran down the road, arms open, calling out party instructions. How much more should that reflect in my response to my son as he is growing up.

This fatherhood thing is fun, dirty reflections and all.

What is Church?

I've got a question for you.

             Do you attend church?

            Or are you a part of a local church?

There is a difference. Do you go to the movies? Or are you involved in the culture of a particular movie? There are some similarities. You know, like Trekkies. They are different. But they aren't the normative movie goer. It seems to me that there are also similarities between movie "goers" and church "goers". They both go to be entertained. They both leave and aren't part of anything. There is not unity in a group of theater goers and for many so-called Christians there is no unity for them. If the movie or the church don't meet their criteria then they take their popcorn and go to the theater/church down the street.

For me, I have found I identify much more with the various people at church than I do with the majority of people that share my last name, the people I grew up with and the one that birthed me. That guy on the other side of the isle wants to glorify God. He and I don't talk much but his daughters were in Sparks when my wife and I were leaders there. His girls were a good testament to his and his wifes parenting.

There's another guy over to my right that has always been there for me. He invited us to join his adult Sunday School class when my wife and I were newly married. He and I have gutted deer together. We sat in a creek on a hot summer day while his children threw rocks upstream. We talked about discouragement and came away encouraged. He doesn't know it but he and two other guys that have helped to mold me into a man all shared the same name,the name that we were going to give to the child we lost to miscarriage.
There is a quiet guy on the other side of church. He has no idea the impact he's had on my life. He was part of that Sunday School that the other guy invited us to. His hard work ethic could put a draft horse to shame. He speaks his mind,but so humbly that you couldn't be offended.
And there, closer to the front is a guy with some wacky colored socks. I went to him several years ago when my marriage was on the rocks, when I figured out I didn't have it going on like Donkey Kong and needed help. He encouraged me back from the edge of frustration. We met every week for over a year and a half. He answered the phone every time I  called with questions (and there was a lot of those times). And usually he didn't tell me I was screwing things up. He just asked the right questions until I figured it out. I wouldn't have dealt with me so gracefully, but he did. And that taught me a lot about parenting. Grace and asking questions, not throwing out accusations.
And there, kinda towards the back is a younger guy. I've known him since he was in high school. He was a punk then. Maybe still a little bit now. But man, has he grown up into a Godly man. Watching him grow into manhood has been like watching a firework that fizzled like a dud shoot into the sky and steal the show. Men twice his age don't have the drive to beat themselves into submission the way he does. I don't either, but he's unknowingly encouraging me to do so.

Do you get what I'm saying? Some people identify with a movie or a bar or a frat or what-have-you but my identity lies with my church family. Our identity is in our Savior. We die and sacrifice for each other because Jesus, our Savior, died and sacrificed for us.

Dirty Discipline: Or Recovering the Righteous

It is amazing to me the varied and usually hostile attitudes that develop when this subject is considered. I'd like to say I've heard it all but that usually means that I haven't. The experience has given my intestines a sympathetic reaction whenever I approach the study or discussion of church discipline. Even now my stomach churns like a washing machine on agitate. It is truly heartbreaking to hear that someone has come under the final stages of church discipline. It brings me to tears every time actually. I'd like to, for whatever reason, introduce what my studies on 1 Corinthians 5 have taught me.

Let it begin...

The Real Sin

In my NASB version 1 Corinthians 5 is titled Immorality Rebuked . Many of the sermons and commentaries I've read use some variation of that idea. This is the title the translators have decided to use but I think it comes up short as a good descriptor of the actual intent of the chapter. Clearly sexual immorality is the example given but I think that this particular immorality, any immorality, is the symptom of the actual problem that Paul is wanting the church to address. The issue is the unrepentant heart. The unrepentant heart cannot learn and it cannot grow and it cannot do those things because it cannot fellowship (1 John 1:6-7). The unrepentant heart can manifest itself through any sin and a short list is given later in the chapter. And typically those that find themselves on the receiving end of discipline wish that the list is exhaustive. I think it is clear that the list is giving an example of the actions of the unrepentant.

While many sermons and commentaries focus on the particular sin mentioned in chapter 5 we would do a serious disservice to ignore the weightier matter of unrepentance. A Christian is one who has given themselves to God as a sacrifice, ridding the old self, the flesh, and has put on a new man (Ephesians 4:24,Colossians 3:10)  So it goes against all that is Christlike to hang on to our old ways. Seems pretty basic but there are those who apparently think that we are saved in sin and not from it.
So, if we have a brother who names himself a Christian and he acts continually in sin and shirks his responsibility to repent then it is commanded here in 1 Corinthians 5 (and Matt 18 and 2 Thes 3) to not interact with that "so-called" believer as we would those true to the faith, those who love God.

The Sin of the Church
Or, Your Boasting is Not Good

Here is another part where we arrogantly drop the ball just as the church in Corinth did. We still think we know better than God. I have been told by many Christians that they could never take part in disciplining someone out of the church. That is high arrogance cloaked in false humility. We sound like the serpent when we ask "Did God really say that we should put this person out of the church?" Let's just look clearly at what Paul is saying: vs 2 "Let him who has done this be removed from you"... vs 5 "You are to deliver this man to Satan..." vs 11 "...not to even eat with such a one"...vs 13 " Purge the evil person from among you". These are just the obvious ones. There are several other verses that are understood in their context.  What is there to misunderstand about those admonitions? A common argument is that it is unloving to do this. Brothers and sisters, God is our standard of love. Discipline is love. Do parents not discipline their children? Does the state not discipline lawbreakers?  How else is the church to handle the unrepentant? In 1 Corinthians 6 Paul has plenty to say about our ability to judge earthly and spiritual matters. To do less is abdication. Some people recoil in horror when they find that the disciplined person was announced from the pulpit at church, apparently not having read what Matthew 18:17 and 1 Corinthians 5:4,5 say, not to mention the times when Paul actually names names of those who have fallen away in his various writings. We have to be careful that our standard of holiness is not "higher" than Gods.
Another argument against church discipline is that by doing so we no longer have a positive influence over the unrepentant. This is more arrogance. I assure you that we have much less influence when we are disobeying God than when we are obeying God. Who is the one that gives salvation? Clearly it is not us. Discipline is the point we hand over the unrepentant to Satan for the destruction of his sin (1Cor5:5) so that his soul may be saved. To not discipline is to aid and abet when affliction is needed. Don't muddle in the Holy Spirits business. He is much more qualified than you.

Recovering the Repentant

This is everyones favorite part. Those that wish not to take part in disciplining want a false version of this fellowship. The repentance of a fallen brother or sister is a time of great celebration and also a beginning of, if not the return to, serious discipleship. Trust must be restored. Slipping back into sin can happen but if the restored individual quickly confesses and runs back to the safety of the church and his disciplers encouragement should be just as quick.

------        ------          ------        -----      ------      -------

This is a short version of several rough drafts that I have written. Honestly, I feel like I could write a small book on this subject. I find great comfort in knowing that my church does disciple and discipline and I wouldn't be a part of a church that doesn't actively do both. In fact a church isn't a church that doesn't do both. It is just a religious club. So what do you do if you are a leader of one of these church clubs and you realize you have left out this essential part of Church Body care? You confess to God. You confess to your congregation. You disciple. And then you discipline. God receives the repentant.

Real Freedom, Real Security

I recently read a quote that said,in effect, that "Nowhere is freedom held so sacred than in the hands that are holding it for the very first time".

For whatever reason when I read this I flashed back not quite twenty years ago to a street in Kiev, Ukraine. I was on a mission trip and it was our day off to see the beautiful, old city. Being obviously not local we sometimes were approached by beggers and one particular lady I'll never forget. She was elderly and came up to me for some reason and started on in an angry voice. Even though she was speaking in Ukrainian I could tell she was likely cursing me out. Our translators told her to buzz off and, after a bit, she did. It took awhile to talk our translator, Lyuda, (we joked that her last name was Kriss. Say it out loud if you don't get it) into telling us what the old lady had said. Roughly translated the babushka was angry at the hardship that Ukraines newfound independence had brought to her people. She was right. Life has gone from difficult to downright unpredictably difficult since Independence was declared in 1991. Teachers (who were highly valued and well paid) hadn't received a paycheck from the government in months. Many had resorted to bartering from their gardens to get necessities. People removed their windshield wipers so they wouldn't get stolen, and only replaced them when it rained.
These people had come from communism to the birth (of a sort) of freedom. Many were excited but many were fearful. From a communist/ socialist government you get a weak form of security at the price of freedom. Some people, like this old lady, had grown  accustomed to that security and lived in fear of the dangers of freedom.

Sadly there are many like that even in this country. They are like Red in The Shawshank Redemption, but without the excuse of already being imprisoned and institutionalized. And they really do prefer a secular legalism as a security over spiritual freedom. Sin blinds. It blinds so completely that it views the state to be higher than God. The "god" state provides a false security, and it provides new definitions, and if those definitions can be twisted it can provide "redemption" redefined. It can give the nod to perversion, approval of pre-natal murder, and the atta-boy to legalized thievery.
Simply put when people choose not to be a slave to Christ, whose burden is light, they will choose the oppressive burden of anything else. Freedom is scary when there are no Godly parameters to control it. But just as terrible is a government with no Godly borders. The founding fathers of this nation understood that. That is the reason we were such a great nation. People that govern themselves in accordance with the freedoms given in Scripture will experience a freedom not seen in all of history.

Ben Franklin nearly had it when he said " He who would trade essential liberty to obtain a little security deserves neither and will lose both". I  suggest that when our security and liberty are found in our Creator no government can take those away. And a government that understands this and incorporates it into their form of government will prosper.

Wisdom in a Box

Okay, so I have blogged about birthdays and how disinterested I was in them. And now I'm going to write about a birthday that won't happen for 10 1/2 years.

But remember, I left myself an out at the end of that blog post, "...birthdays are no big deal unless they mark years of wisdom gained".

A few years ago some great friends invited us to their sons 13th birthday celebration. They asked each adult male to be ready to share something with their son, some wisdom, some Bible verses. They wanted this to be the catapult to launch him into manhood. They documented this "rite of manhood" party in a book for Nick to refer back to in the future. And we were fortunate to attend the same event for their twin 15 year old boys.

I love this idea. I know its not new. Many cultures and religions have done similar things to prepare their future men, but it is something that our church culture has forgotten. We, as churched men, have neglected to hand over the responsibilities that we have. Or maybe we haven't even taken on our responsibilities and therefore have nothing to give?

I think far out to Ethan's 13th birthday and know that it will be here much to fast. I know, just as my friends knew with their boys, that we shouldn't wait for a birthday or as they are heading out the door on their own to give them our wisdom. That is clearly a day by day thing (Deut 6:4-7). But the celebration of manhood, of maturity and the requirement of young boys to seek those things alongside a desire for Godliness is an excellent thing. Such a celebration is not just a tool to admonish and encourage young men in maturity and righteousness but it is a reminder to the older men, the givers of advice, of their responsibility to grow the next generation.

Stay with me, we are going to take a different road now that will hopefully (if I am a good tour guide) bring us back to the same place.

I don't know exactly how it got started but several years ago one of my brothers and I half joked about an imaginary box that we dubbed "Gifted at Birth". When we came across something that seemed so essential to living we would say that it should be "Gifted at Birth". Given our predisposition to camping, guns and nature the items usually revolved around that. A hatchet that was so well built that it was something every man should have, or a rugged pocket knife that had served us well, or a .22 pistol that one could train a novice with and yet a skilled man could use to bring home dinner. These were the things that one would receive in the mythical G@B box.

Do you see where I'm going here? Or have I got lost in my own little world? Its been known to happen.
Maybe I have read to many Art of Manliness blog posts. Or I remember the Happy Hollister books from my childhood way to well. I dunno.

I see symbolism. Does that scare you?

                                               Baptism.
                                                                  Communion.

Here is my idea.
A box containing Symbols of manhood. Reminders of his Creator. Useful tools to a man.
To my son these gifts would be different, possibly, from what another father doing the same thing might gift to his son. But, in my mind, the goal and the symbol would be very similar.

First, the box could be as simple as an ammo can or as elaborate as a handcrafted wood box. But it would be sturdy and of good quality. I like the ammo can. It's former contents symbolic of the items necessary to attack life's problems. Plus ammo can are cool.

All the items should be of the highest quality that a man could afford. These could be handed down to grandchildren. You don't want a stingy legacy. They should be much like wisdom and just as useful in every day life. And if you're in my situation you have a few years to save up.

Some basics for my son:
(And obviously these should be tailored to the interests of your son and mine may change as Ethan grows)

• a pocket knife. Sturdy, its always useful and always prepared.
• a book of poetry. Recognize beauty, stretch the brain.
• a favorite book of mine. Or four.
• a collection of wisdom and advice from the men present for his passage into manhood.
• a Zippo lighter. It is always handy to have the ability to start a fire and Zippos are an icon of that.

The ideas I have would probably overflow the box if I decide to give all of them.

Remember, this is a gift to encourage. It should spur your future man onward, not remind him of the "shortcomings" you perceive because of your high school aspirations. In other words don't give your boy a custom made catchers mitt when you know good and well he doesn't share your interest in the sport.

At least some of the things should symbolize the responsibilities of being a man. A knife or firearm (most boys should be responsible at this age to maintain these items in a mature manner) would be representative of the responsibility to protect his family. If he is a camper like me a cast iron skillet (because those are awesome) would be a good symbol of his charge to serve and also to provide for others. Yes, it is manly to cook.

These are just my ideas based on what I've seen few others do. But regardless of how one goes about it we need to charge our boys with the desire for manliness. And manliness goes with Godliness. This isn't a thing that a church program should do but it should be supported by the church. This is a thing fathers should plan for their boys. 
Lastly, if you haven't been a leader and mentor to your son there is nothing better than a humble father asking his children for forgiveness and looking to the example of our Lord for guidance.

Tell Stories, Fight Foolishness

I never remember my birthday. In fact, I often forget what day it is on (is it the 28th or 29th?) and how old I am. In this moment I can't remember if I'm 34 or turning 34 on my next birthday.
I'm not afraid of knowing my age or aging. Its just that celebrating a birthday seems so...ugh, lame. It seems like the equivalent to celebrating a climb up Mount Everest when you've just landed in Nepal. Now I admit that children's birthdays are important. My son is really a different person than he was a year ago. And a year from now. But that drastic change does slow down eventually. We never stop changing but we don't learn a new language every year, right?  I remember when I was nine years plus 364 days and thinking that once I hit those double digits I would be so grown up. Now, I don't know what I was expecting (a beard?) but the next morning I ran in to the bathroom and looked in the mirror and, shock of all shock, I looked exactly the same.

Don't misunderstand me. I'm not afraid of aging. I would gladly tell you my age if you asked (and if I could remember it). Its not something to be embarrassed by. For anyone. Unless we're not acting our age. But that is subjective and less confining than most think it is. Age gives you experience. Experience is the strength of age (Proverbs 20:29) Stories of the aged are carriers of wisdom for the young. The young have physical strength but listen to their stories much and, well wisdom is often in short supply. But nothing is so unfortunate as grey hair and wisdomless stories. Age gives opportunity for wisdom but no guarantee.

I am a young parent (not much experiential wisdom), but one thing I see that disturbs me are fathers who are afraid to tell their stories. Often, and understandably, this is the case when they have stories of failure or sin. But those are where the lessons are like the leagues of the sea. Deep, if you didn't catch that.

One friend of mine who was of the the age when stories were made and not yet told liked to party at night yet had to work hard in the fields by day. He found that the proper application of his T-shirt around his neck would cause him to um, " fall asleep" for a few seconds and trick his body into thinking it had slept for hours. And then, being well rested, he could work like an ox. Clearly not a story you would relate to your seven year old but one you could tell your 17 year old. And the moral of the story being that partying to hard makes choking yourself seem like a reasonable endeavor. Some stories are age appropriate.

There are two stories that Ethan will hear from his grandfather and I. Stories of fighting. Or not fighting. From my dad comes the story of a bully who taunted him on the way home from school. My dad, ever the lover not fighter, stepped aside as the bully let fly a punch which was thrown powerfully enough to propel the antagonista into a muddy puddle. Moral of the story: You don't have to play by the rules and square off. Sometimes doing nothing reveals the foolishness of your opponent. And that you don't have to fight to be a man.
From me comes the story of the youth group bully who went around picking on and intimidating the weak and frail (me) at the youth lock in. As he attempted to get me into the umpteenth headlock and gut punch combo of the night I stepped aside and lifted my foot in a kicking fashion, connecting in a location that convinced the bully in the error of his ways. Moral of the story: There is a time for everything. And the timing of a kick is important. And that sometimes you have to fight when your a man.

The Bible tells stories with little tenderness for faults. And we shouldn't balk at that when it comes to the stories we tell. Especially of ourselves. From stories about me Ethan will know that listening to his wife and being tender to her fears could keep his house from foreclosure. He'll know that hard work always pays off but not always in the paycheck. He'll know that even when he messes up as a teen he will always be loved by his dad because his dad remembers those years well.

And he'll know to remember those stories of failure and victory and to tell his children. And that birthdays are no big deal unless they mark years of wisdom gained.

Without Posting It On Facebook....

On Facebook and Instagram and other social media there are "those guys" that fall into one of these following categories. You know, those guys who always post pics of their latest meal, or their cat, or the dozen selfies of them driving in their car or standing next to their "bestie". Or the latest: Dudes posting shoe collections that would turn Imelda Marcos Irish with envy ( said dudes not old enough to know who Imelda is).
But the only ones that really give me need for an ibuprofen are the serial fad dieters and on again off again gym gerbils. I mean really ,the people who are ACTUALLY working out don't have time to post about it or are actually doing it not to garner attention but to stay healthy and give God an excuse to keep them on this planet a little longer.

Do the "I just ate a mash of organic ground cucumber and celery and I feel great!" crowd really think we believe them? Much less feel motivated to join them on their third fad diet this year?  Its not that I feel that dieting and working out are bad things its just that those that are the loudest about it and the most insistent that everybody should join them are usually the worst at it.
Can you imagine if we all posted what we do with the same attitude as "those guys"? Here's one: "I spent 5 hours crocheting today! What did you do?!" Or " I pounded out 13 chapters in War and Peace! Only 352 to go before Thanksgiving! I'm a reading giant! Aaarrrgghh!

And most of my friends are Christians so they have good, family and God oriented "reasons" for doing these things. Reasons like "I spend 4 hours in the gym every day so I can live to see my kids grow old". Which is great until you realize that your kids don't know you because you've been at the gym their whole life. Or " The body is God's temple so I must take care of it". Which usually means eating like a miser....which is usually followed by eating like a stoner, guilt trips included.

I know, I know. You say "But you do need to do everything to take care of yourself". If you really believe that ,if you really believe the body is a temple and you can prolong your life, then guard it. Get a gun and take responsibility, not only for your life, but your families life as well. That's what I do. And I've been consistent at it for nearly 14 years.

And I haven't posted "Did 20 dry fire reps like a boss!" once in all that time. 

Story Time

A few years ago Ronnie Barrett, a prodigious and well respected firearms manufacturer laughed in the face of the corrupt government of California when they saw fit to ban firearms in the .50 caliber variety. The .50 caliber was Ronnie's bread and butter. So much so that he is credited with bringing a former heavy machine gun cartridge to the forefront of the long range shooting crowd (in my mind,the golfers of the firearms community, no disrespect meant to either party). Anyways, the small minds in control of California decided that their minions could not be trusted with such devastating .50 cal power and passed into unlawful law that such firearms would no longer be for sale in their domain. Mr Barrett , being a thinking man and one who supported a free and armed people, produced to the public a letter directed to the government of this sad state which I will summarize with less eloquence than he : Because of your actions all state owned Barrett Rifles will no longer be serviced by Barrett. I will also build a bullet and weapon that is sub .50 and will be superior to the .50 in accuracy, trajectory and transfer of energy. Take that!
And so Ronnie built the .416 ,Cali-legal, and at least as equal to the .50 in every way that would make some leftist gun grabber wet themselves.

Another story....

Recently in Colorado the pot smoking heads of the government decided that their minions would be to dangerous if they were capable of holding more than 15 rounds of ammo in their evil black rifles. Magpul,located in Colorado, is a prodigious and well respect.....are we seeing a theme here?....well respected producer of firearms related parts with a specialty in building the finest standard capacity AR-15 magazines (not clips,you bonehead) These Magpul magazines are often purchased by our soldiers out of their own pockets because the ones issued tend to work like everything else the government produces. And anyways, Magpul being run by a man of good conscience, could not see fit to remain in a state whose leadership spent most of their time hot boxing in cannabis filled rooms coming up with such daft drafts of illegal "law" like limiting their constituents to sub cap mags. So Magpul said; and I will summarize in my previous fashion, you know, less eloquence and such:

Hey! Potheads we're leaving if you pass this law.

So Colorado passed the law and as Magpul is now packing up their company (as well as 600 jobs and $85 million in revenue) to move to a free state they have also started Operation Boulder Drop. They are offering $5 flat rate shipping of unlimited quantities of 30 magazines anywhere in the state of Colorado until the law goes into effect.

These stories are old news if you are in the firearms world but they hint-with a bull horn- at the ever encroaching government power mongers. You might not be a gun nerd such as I and the millions these laws weigh down on but your hobbies,your rights, your freedom is next. And while these companies were able to briefly skirt the decrees thrown at them soon you will have to choose, not which laws to skirt but which laws to break. I want freedom. I want my son to grow up in freedom. Firearms are only a small part of that but a vital part. If you don't believe me its time you brushed up on your history. And after you do that and you say "It can't happen to us" then its time you went back and really studied.

To Go Boldly, Go Humbly

There are a few books that stay in my revolving library, the books that I go back to often because they have a fair depth to them that seems to grow and encourage me wherever I am in life. "Future Men" by Doug Wilson is one such "go to" book.
Here is an excerpt from the chapter Doctrinal Meat

" Our boys need to learn humility, and they also need to learn boldness and courage. The only way to accomplish this in balance is through a grasp of who God is. Because we have ceased teaching that God is our father, with the attributes of a divine father, we have lost an understanding of imitative masculinity. Because of this, our boys veer into one of two ditches. Either they embrace humility without boldness, which in boys is effeminate, or they embrace boldness without humility which is destructive. "

Feel free to interchange "boys" with "men" and it will be just as accurate. As Christian men we need to lead our families with boldness, which is difficult, as a wife with any sort of consciousness can see our faults. And we must lead with humility because Christ has redeemed us. And He is our perfect example.

Battle Rattle

Looking across the surface of this next year-just the surface,mind you- I don't find much on this celestial dirt clod to pin my hopes to. We see the president of our country becoming more powerful while our country itself  weakens. The freedom our founders spoke of and did their best to insure we have are being infringed upon by our government at the encouragement of the people who empower it. These same people are slipping their ankles and wrists into the stocks of safeties illusion. We kill babies every day on the alter of convenience and blame inanimate objects when someone decides to do a few post natal abortions. 

We see churches in this land look for relevance without looking to the Scripture that could actually give them relevance. The church has lost its direction and refuses to look at the Map.

And all this could make a thinking Christian a little long in the face. But remember I mentioned that part about the surface. Our God moves above and below the surface of the dimension that we see. He is sovereign. And He plans good for those that truly love Him.
Fearlessly we can pin our hope on Him and not be ashamed.
I suspect that the church will see a bit of winnowing in my lifetime. I think we have seen the red skies of morning and not taken heed. Living Christ-like lives will soon cost us. It will cost us friendships and family, jobs and reputation.

On a personal note I have seen the huge personal cost in my life and personal/ family relationships so I'm not looking at a future spiritual battle with the starry eyes of a new recruit, ready for action. No, it puts a lump in my throat and the shakes in my hands. It, in the most real sense of the words, puts the fear of God in my bones. Spiritual battle splays one open and hacks out the evil within and out. It purifies Gods soldier and crushes the enemy at the same time. But that same purification does winnow out the soldier who liked the flash of the armor and the benefits of being in Gods Army but didn't prepare for battle. And that is hard for the good soldier to see. Its painful to see so called Christians set down the sword and walk away.

I see a spiritual battle ahead for the church in the U.S. and many won't make it. And just like in earthly battle many will claim to have fought in order to receive the benefits of being a veteran.
I'm not trying to be dramatic when I say its time for battle. The battle has been raging and the church in the U.S. has been absent. So suit up, this fight isn't against flesh and blood but against the dark forces of the world and we need to sharpen our swords.